Oh, we know. No one is trying to come down on you (or they shouldn't), it's just that some of us have been left with a bitter taste in our mouths due to our experiences.
I have had the fortune to have remained utterly neutral and fairly unknown, so issues with organizations of one kind or another have been bizarre and inconvenient to me at worst. I was just always sort of flabbergasted by the (to me) obvious short-sightedness of all parties involved because I had played with everybody independently and had a great time/ met good people on all occasions.
Different people enjoy/ need different levels of structure. Some people absolutely love clubs and rituals surrounding their BBQs and beers (Masons), some people think a back yard and an old t-shirt is fine thanks (me). Trying to force all Grillmasters to live under a strict 'Slobs Only' code of conduct would be ridiculous and arrogant of me. Likewise, having a Masonic order require my membership before my brisket can be seen as legitimate before the grilling community would be equally dumb.
"Lets all just eat the damned meats and trade recipes, I'll follow your lead at your house, please respect my rules at mine." is pretty much where the majority of active players are at now.
It's ordered chaos but considering we're the jocks of hard-core nerds
and we do MIL-LARP it's probably the best we can hope for.
Edit: I got all inspired and made this handy diagram as a visual aid: