My wife has only played indoor CQB and she's played dozens of times now.
At her first game I gave her a plastic bodied M4, cause it was the lightest gun I owned. But she found it too heavy and too long. So I ended up giving her a G18c to use which she loved because it was select fire.
But since then she's been using a 1911, and occasionally uses the G18c.
For gear, she's using a SEALS style vest, since those were the most adjustable. We've found they can be adjusted to the smallest size the best. And she's got all her own gear as well, helmet, facemask, gloves... any HK/CM knock off gloves sized M or S will fit small women's hands. I bought her a pair of knock off Oakley tactical gloves with the carbon fibre knuckles and she loved them.
At first she was using a facemask with mesh goggles, but she couldn't see down on her chest to grab new mags, so she uses a Brassguard mesh mask... one of those fencing style masks. And she loves that as well.